So things are starting to happen, people are starting to settle in, find a financial comfort zone, strike miracles with their banks, and so on and so forth. Over the past however long we've officially been in a recession, there's been a lot of hardships, broken hearts, broken people, and just people who are totally and completely lost with no help what-so-ever. One thing that's hurting many is that people have to move from place to place to find somewhere that has a job market or find someplace that is decent that they can raise their children in or even someplace they can afford and it's really difficult lately. With the economic down turn, it's hard to come across a decent deal on a house in a decent area that's not going to cause you harm, and that has a job market. So people have to pack up and leave and do it all over again.

Now, I found out last weekend that I'm moving, and it's been really hard. I've been torn between two places for quite a while now and I'm being forced to go to one and completely abandon my friends. Or at least that's what it feels like. For quite sometime I've been wanting to move back to North Carolina because that's where my family is, my boyfriend is, the place that I've always seemed at home is, and many many more things are. But also for quite sometime, I've been comfortable here with my best friend Alissa, had fun being able to go to the little humble beach that's 30 minutes away, found a wonderful church family that I can't even begin to explain what they've done for me and my family, and spent most of my adolescence here, in Florida. But what's been getting me is that I've seemed to be so distant from everyone else here in Florida for some time and have tried to get back in touch with people and tried to get settled in again, but I just couldn't. I just felt so uncomfortable. More and more my heart just wanted to leave and forget it because I felt like a reject, like someone who just didn't fit in, in anything, ever.

The only single person that truly hurts to leave is Alissa. My best friend that I've had for four years since I was 12. She was the first person to except me when I moved here and will be the last person to forget me out of who was here. Now I know that sounds terrible, but I mean it in a way that she'll never have to try to remember what we did, she's the person that's closest to me here and lets just face it, we always tend to not think about someone, but she seems to be someone who never wants to forget me, and the same for me to her. We've been with each other through the worst of the worst, the hard of the hard, the best of the amazing, everything. We we're saved together...or close to it =] and we kept each other's backs, and held each other accountable. Lets just say, we're the best of friends...the best of best of best of friends, and there's nothing in the world that I would do to hurt her intentionally. But I feel God's plan is bigger than just being Alissa's friend.

I was told today by a close friend of the family in the church that she's sad for us because we're having to leave the church, but she's happy for us because it's a new page in our book with our walk with Christ as a family unit and as individuals. She's seen us grow so much in God's heart and she's seen what a difference we've made in the church. Many reasons go into us moving, but a very big one is that much of my family in North Carolina is having health issues, so we're going there for support. So this woman thought, as well did we, that it was just that we've been resisting God's plan for us to save our hearts from being torn apart and that He thinks it's time to move on and spread the love more.

Love. Love. Love love love love love. Yes...it's come. Have you ever heard that verse from a song, "All we need is love, love, love?" Well you know, it's true. Jesus loves, God loves, the Holy Spirit loves. It says it in the most famous verse in the bible. "For God so LOVED the world that he gave his one and only Son." John 3:16. Jesus himself loved so many people when he walked the Earth. He healed many, fed 5000 people with 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish and had 12 baskets of left overs, and he even stood up for a prostitute, he said "He who is without sin be the first to throw a stone." He wasn't trying to shut them down, he was trying to open their eyes. Make them realize they're all in the same boat. We're human! We can't live without sin! Remember the story about Adam and Eve? Yes you do, it's all over the place! We're taught it without reluctance. The figs leaves, everything about it is in our culture. But what did Eve do that God told her not to? She ate the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. Satan tempted and tried her, and she gave in. We do it everyday. God didn't stop loving Eve for what she did, so why would God stop loving us?

The literal meaning of Christian is "Christ-like," so if Christ loved shouldn't we? That doesn't mean to go and condemn people of their sins, like some churches...(ehem...Westboro Baptist Church...) you know I'm kidding. Maybe not... But that doesn't mean that I don't love them. They're people just like us! They are a perfect example of non-perfect people! They feel that God hates those who don't follow his word and that's not true. How many of them do you think are putting up a front to "make God happy?" They're like the Pharisees. They felt because someone didn't follow the laws down to the point that God would condemn them and smite them and ended up taking that job upon themselves. Look where it got them, they ended up crucifying the one and only Messiah of this world.

Now I'm not saying to spit on them and condemn them, that would make you seem like the biggest hypocrite there could be. You show them love. Love is the most powerful gift you can give a person. Today in church, the message was about trusting God enough to give what you have so he will provide ALL of what you need (now I wish I still had the verses from today's sermon.) Now I'm a teenager and I don't have much of an income, and I don't really have much at all that I don't need right now, but the very least I personally can give is love. Being support is a very big way of helping someone. Even doing it without the mention of Jesus' name puts a big impact on someone and will eventually lead them towards Jesus. You're an asset to God's Kingdom, and part of what we're ALL called to do is love one another.

In youth this past week my youth pastor was away and one of the men in church who is a very good speaker (if I'm not mistaken was a pastor in Georgia) talked with us about loving our enemy. He used an analogy of when an old lady put one penny in the offering, everything she had and this big rich guy came up and tore her up for only being able to put one penny in and he put in much of what he had. But the old lady got more treasures in heaven (again wish that I remembered the verses for this) because she gave everything she had for the true love of God and wasn't ashamed of it. Then he went on to talk about how we've been hurt in the past, and how it's still hurting us now. For example, you've felt that you've been left out, you've been pushed and bullied, you've been tormented, and so on and so on. But instead of following that instinct of going back and retaliating, we show them love. In fact, show them more love than we've shown our closest friends and family. While they may still not like you on the outside, you've struck a chord in their heart you've just opened a door for them that God wanted you to. They're going to remember the deed you've done for them and you'll be another stepping stone for them to someday be in the Kingdom of God, and not only that, you've just got yourself some more treasures in heaven.

You see how this works? When you love others in the name of Jesus, Jesus will work in them and in you to become better people. Show them the way! Be a stepping stone and don't condemn, retaliate, hate, or anything, because that's not what God wants you to do. He wants you to be like his Son, Jesus. He wants you to love and show others. So while mine and my family's work here is done, it's definitely not through. We've got so much more love to spread it's impossible to contain it! This week I've gotten my eyes opened so much that I can't help but to rejoice and praise God for what he's done for us and for this community and I pray that he doesn't stop there (not that he will.) This is a new chapter for me and my family and we're not done showing the love. So rejoice and sing with the angels as people are being brought into the light and pray that there will be more.

(P.S. If you have any of the verses that I need from the parts with the wishing I had the verses, please let me know they they are and where. Thanks! ^_^)

While things start to straighten out in my life and God is becoming clear, I'm still unsure about many different things. In February I was introduced to the concept of fasting. When I first heard it I thought it was ridiculous, but being the sport that I am I gave it a shot. I didn't really help much at the time, but now I think I understand it.

In the book God-o-lo-gy, by Christian George he mentions something about the importance of fasting. Fasting shows your true faith in God for supplying you with your needs and not what you feel is most important. You can fast from all sorts of things, TV, internet, your iPod, the computer, video games, magazines, food, almost anything that you do daily. Of course the most popular one is food and mainly because it's the most traditional. Many times in the bible it's describes someone fasting from food to praise God and get guidance. And that's what I'm looking for.

I'm starting to realize that while I'm learning to study the Bible and pray, I've also got to fast as praise. I need to be able to prove that I'm willing to give my body's condition to God to take care of and get clarity. The cool thing is, not only is it good for the soul, it's good for the body.

Your body carries many toxins from your food that you feed yourself daily. While your feces is the excretion of toxins, your replenishing your body with them all the time. So even though your body cleans it out of your system all the time, it's constantly having to do it and never gets a break. Fasting gives your body a chance to cleanse out every part of your body, your kidneys, your heart, your liver, it's just very refreshing. While the results in the toilet aren't nessessarily the most prettiest part of it, it's extremely healthy for your body.

But besides that you also get clarity from God as to what he wants you to do. Whenever you have the urge to do whatever you're fasting from, you're supposed to go into prayer. This shows that you're handing your will and desires to God to take care of and show you the way to what he has in store for you. Fasting is one of the best ways to get an understanding of what God is wanting you to do.

Before you decide to fast make sure you realize that it's between God and you. Don't go boasting about it to everyone, it's not their business. Pray about it and make sure that that's what God is wanting you to do. Don't be afraid to do it though, let God take you in and let Him into your heart.

What God has for me in my life today!
   

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